This is my rambling, nonsensical response to your comments on the previous post:
Tracey, I had no idea at all that you were an RN. Thank you so much for responding with so much insight. I must say, I think that is exactly what I was looking for. I keep asking questions to no one and hoping for some sanity.
When he was sent home, he didn't seem "unhealthy". I suspect the doctors didn't expect him to weaken so badly or so quickly. I feel he should have gone back the first day he couldn't walk on his own. My poor Mom. She wasn't raised to express emotion and she is just not making the best decisions. She gives off the impression that she can though. I have told her again and again that she must demand responses. She keeps saying "you catch more flies with honey" and I keep saying "You haven't caught a fly yet. Use flypaper." I wish I could be THERE 24/7. I have no qualms about putting everyone on the spot constantly.
As for second opinions: This is the third hospital. MD Anderson a is top cancer treatment center. Isn't it a shame that we can't get insurance companies to buy off on CONSTANT second opinions?
This blog is my best log of the events. And it's a pretty good timeline. I'm keeping it because I want to remember everything. The idea of sueing never crossed my mind. I don't think it would be "profitable" in any way at this point. And Christa, you are absolutely right that no monetary gain would ease the suffering. Besides, no one has time or energy now to be bothered with recapping the events.
Autumn, You and I have the same perspective. I believe doctors are human and we put them in godlike positions. They simply do not have all of the answers. They learn and adapt and modify for each patient and they cannot constantly assess everyone. I told both my mother and my father that no one at that hospital knows what the situation is until they are told, and they must be told often.
UPDATE: PERCENTAGES
Today's story comes from the surgeon who finally visited them today. My father is weak but getting stronger because of fluids and blood transfusions. He can eat anything he likes (no diet restrictions). He now has a physical therapist who will be doing "agressive" physical therapy to prepare my father for.....
The Surgery.
We are expecting and hoping that the surgery will take place before the new year. (to avoid the $5000 deductible that starts 1-1-06). Also, the doctor said this: "This cancer is NOT killing you. You have a 70% chance of full recovery if we can get you physically strong and perform the surgery."
70%
What is that? Better than 50% but with plenty of CYA room for error? The fractal above...that's about 70% of the original. But you couldn't recognize the original from it.
They also have him on meds to regulate his heart rate. Why didn't they do that before? Instead they shocked his heart to stop it and then shocked it back. Frightening!
I don't know if they have test results to back this yet. I get the info third hand at best.
Thank you all for your words and your information and your caring souls.
We'll change the mood tomorrow. :)
Love
6 comments:
Tracey, you always make me smile. You have an overwhelming, comforting way about you. Bedside manner I suppose. :)
I'm very sorry about your father. I can fully understand the impact that must have. Maybe his passing changed the course of your life in a positive direction. We can never see those things when we're in the throes of the loss.
It has actually crossed my mind that losing my beloved pet was a lesson to teach me that I can cope...and I can heal...if I have to.
Good to know about the shocking thing. That story terrified me. The very idea. I got the details on it from Dad and it nearly stopped my own heart. I won't share. It's too frightening.
70% is a good number. I'm hoping the number is really more like 80 but the doc doesn't want to be overly optimistic just yet. Cushion, I guess.
I hope that statement that the cancer is NOT killing him has brought is mood back from such deep depression he had last week.
The hospital is the best place for him right now.
I can't wait til I can get that 70% fractal rendered at 100%. You'll love it.
((((((((((Tracey)))))))))))
Thanks...as always.
Evening Agnes,
My impression is Doctors will be very cautious, when offering out such estimations, which must mean 70% is the absolute minimum figure.
Hugs and love as always, x
70% is a lot. As a comparison they gave me less than 50% chance and about 2 more weeks to live before the surgery.
If they can get your dad strong enough and if he's got the right attitude (you guys have to get him out of the depression...coz that will be essential for his recovery), he's got a very good chance to beat this.
:hugs:
Thanks Autumn. That's a good perspective.
Christa - WOW! That means the world to me. I can't tell you how glad I am that you beat those odds. 70% really does sound like a lot now.
How long ago was your surgery?
(((((((((HUGS TO ALL OF YOU))))))))
It's 10-12 years ago since I had my surgeries and so far so good (knock on wood). As I said, the attitude is very important and do what you can to get your dads mood on the right track again.
I know it's a horrible situation for all of you, and him especially, but as I said earlier, it's very important not to go too deep into that depression.
:hugs:
Keep on the optimistic side! Everyone's right- 70% is pretty good.
I'll keep praying.
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