Tuesday, October 11, 2005

10-11-05 Where did Sunday go? Vertigo!

When I was a kid, my best friend told me her cousin had vertigo. I thought it was a pretty odd thing. I also thought it had something to do with heights and tunnel vision...and possibly Alfred Hitchcock. Well now I've got it and let me tell you, I was dead wrong.

Vertigo is actually more like the fifth shot of tequila. It's that moment when you realize you've had too much liquor. It's knowing that the nausea would go away if you could just stop the room from spinning for a few minutes. It's also knowing that's not going to happen.

I'm not a hypochondriac. I am the opposite of a hypochondriac. I wonder if there's a word for that.
I will go ages without ever telling anyone what ails me. That's actually unfortunate for me.
I am reminded of the great, immortal words of singer Warren Zevon as he was interviewed by David Letterman just months before his death from cancer.
David Letterman: "So, knowing that the end is near, is there anything that you regret?"
Warren Zevon: "Yeah, I regret not going to the doctor."

Regardless, this marks the second occasion and I felt the need to write that down. Mostly because I didn't write it down the first time and I can no longer recall when that was. 6 months ago? 8? Ugh. I'm horrible at remembering dates and times.

So, let's talk about the beginnings of this silliness.
The VOICES told me to:
September of 2004 (or so) I had an odd lump on the right side of my head. It wasn't visible from the outside but I could feel it. It turned out to be a lymph node and I had it removed in January. (Nasty surgery - I don't recommend it.)
The location of the lump was directly over my right eardrum and, I later learned, the main facial nerve went THROUGH this lymph node. Anomolies like this cause strange side effects. Prior to the surgeries, I heard voices. The disembodied kind. Eeeeeep.
I would be sitting in a restaurant and hear my name spoken directly and clearly into my right ear. I would turn, and even answer, assuming someone had recognized me and come up behind me. Nope. I was alone. No one there.
It happened 3 times that I can remember. The time I realized what was happening was in my home. The voice I heard on that occasion was female. I was alone in the house.
I suddenly had a full and clear understandin of what psychotics mean when they say they hear voices. That was freaking ODD.
I haven't heard the voices since ther surgery. More odd; I miss them.

And then there's Tennitus:
All was well and I'm healing up. I had hoped the removal of the lymph node would also offer some relief from the sinus/allergy issues that have been gaining momentum over the past two years or so. I guess not.
I can remember when I didn't have tennitus. That would be around 2000 or so. A friend mentioned that he had it. I remember thinking "That's gotta suck." I had no idea.
Tennitus is a ringing in the ears. For those of you who can hear this frequency, it is the sound a television makes in an empty room with the mute on. It is a high-pitched whine.
This whine NEVER goes away. There are no moments without it. It is much worse at night when other things are quiet. Regardless, it is not generally louder than the things around you.
But...in the past year, and since the surgery, the tennitus changes with the weather. There are days I feel as if I am at the bottom of a 10ft swimming pool. I feel as though both ears are full of water and I cannot get that water out. I even tried for a while before I realiezed the water isn't reachable.
Then the ringing changed into a hum. The hum is a problem. The hum is louder than things around me. It actually rises and falls with the noise level, in order to remain louder than things around me. This makes all noise unbearable. Television is the worst. Wrestling is enough to put me over the top. I loathe wrestling. My husband does not.
I don't tell him he's driving me crazy with the noise. It's not his fault and he can't fix it. Why should he suffer too?
Here's the kicker about the humming. Sharp noises cause vertigo. Last Sunday my husband clapped a mosquito. Right there in the livingroom. "SMACK" and the world began to spin.

So what's it like now: Minnear's Syndrome
I'll have to find the link to Minnear's Syndrome. I'm probably not even spelling it right. Basicaly it is the sudden onset of overwhelming dizziness which causes nausea and a nifty host of other side effects. I've had it twice. The fist time it started from the turn of my head. It lasted about four hours.
This past Sunday, I have no idea what set it off and it stayed mild but consistent most of the day.
My biggest concern: What happens if I'm driving when this coms on? It would be exactly equal to driving and shooting tequila.

Medical notes: Sinus "drying" meds make the condition worse and actually cause the humming.
Caffiene exacerbates the issue. These are the things I know about this so far.
Another 3-4 years and some research and I should be able to appropriately self-diagnose a cure.
I'm crazy like that.





7 comments:

Christa said...

Just like you I have Tinnitus, but I'm also completely deaf on one ear and have 40% left of my hearing on the other, so the high pitch noise from the TV you mentioned in this post is completely unfamiliar to me. At least from the TV. But yes....it's a very loud, almost screaming sound 24hrs a day...and it can change with air pressure like you just described. Flying is a nightmare coz of it.

Before you have one of these dizzy things when you're behind the wheels...why don't you go and see a doc about it? Or is this something they cannot do anything about?

I'm just thinking so you won't regret the same things as Warren Zevon did at Letterman....

Trée said...

I'm here in full listening mode. Thinking of you Aggie.

Becky L said...

i HATE the sound that a TV makes when on mute. that awful high pitched sound. ... ick... it gives me shivers...

so, i feel for you! i hope all gets better!!!

Autumn Storm said...

Sounds very unpleasant, Agnes. Feel for you.

Agnes said...

You know what a cool thing is? It's when I type up some silly dissertation like this at 07:00 a.m. and then go to work and when I check it at 09:30, Christa has already left me a message. That's a cool thing. :)

Thanks for well wishes. This isn't really as serious as it sounds. Well, I'm not addressing it as if it were serious. I really just needed to log the time and the events because I have a horrible memory for things like this. IF the vertigo ever becomes a real imposition in my life, I'll have it checked out. I've read a bit on Meniere's Disease. (spelled correctly that time. http://www.dizziness-and-balance.com/disorders/menieres/menieres.html)
It doesn't appear "cureable" but controllable. There are some drugs available in the UK but not US FDA approved and no real scientific proof of relief (Christa, wanna become my dealer?)

Anyway, thanks all for such kind words. I sincerely hope none of you are ever afflicted as such.

Christa - Didn't know about your hearing loss. Sorry to read about it. My grandfather is the same. Only one ear and less than 20% in that one. He had a digital hearing aid inserted last year.
He likes it and hears things he hasn't since WWII. BUT, of course, it has it's drawbacks as well. Not the least of which is running through batteries like crazy.
So, Christa, are you telling me that you speak and understand 4 languages AND read lips? You amaze me!!!!

And PS: Trée, you'd better watch all that listening. I am VERY easily spoiled. ;)

Trée said...

So I have to use my eyes too. Demanding little missy now aren't we. lol Hey, where are those fractals you promised? I made a long trip over here just to see your creative talent at work . . . ;-)

Christa said...

lol....sorry Agnes, but your early morning is my early afternoon, which means that I'm all over this place before you even get out of bed...like right now ;) It's 3 frigging AM and I'm trying to stay alive...so I thought I'd stop by and see what's happening :)

Hmm...it's a long time ago since I was dealing anything...hehe...but I'm sure we could find you that scientific proof of relif somehow :D

And I lost my hearing a long time ago. It's frustrating sometimes, especially around here since the dialects are tricky to follow as they are. But other than that I'm so use to it I think it bothers others more than me.
I read on lips sometimes...but not all the time. It happens that I just ignore people too...LOL!!

And I won't kick you to a doc unless you want to go...don't worry. I log happenings like these myself just to make sure it won't get lost in the jungle of other things.